. . . and Miscarriage 8 years Later
As far as an update, for the most part we have worked through our grief (or depression according to Nate) and our daily lives are not overshadowed or difficult to get through. There seems to be something special about a year. I don’t know, maybe it’s all in our heads, but the seasons changing or the length of time is just right, or just getting past that first anniversary makes it final and real and so long ago. There are still triggers and the topic is still a bit raw when it comes up. I imagine the triggers will always be there, hopefully the rawness will lessen more over time. A friend of mine had babies fairly close to the due dates of our last two losses, so I sometimes see her updates and imagine our children being those ages. Hearing of people (especially those I know) losing babies will always be difficult for us.
I’m writing this post because in a variety of ways and situations, miscarriage and child loss has been coming up a lot lately. I think the point of all this is that God’s telling me it’s time to make something good out of my experiences. This isn’t really something I want to do (or even know how to do), but I think God wants me to step out of my box a little in order to offer solace to others who have been through this same loss. It’s not that I have any answers, there isn’t a ten step program that I can formulate for them. Each of my losses has been different; different in the season of life they happened in, the way they happened, the way I reacted and recovered. But sitting on this side of it, I think I can offer hope. I won’t be able to do it dry-eyed, but I can tell them they are going to make it if they want to. It won’t be easy, but each day will come whether we want it to or not, and little by little we’ll be able to enjoy life again. I can tell them how important their church family and friends are, and to be willing to accept the help and love that people offer, because most people don’t know what to do or how to help. I can cry with them, pray with them, and listen to them.
I’ve always used our site to reach out to people, so if anyone comes across this post that just needs someone to listen, feel free to contact me. If you don’t know my story, you can read it here. My friends know my story and I hope you feel like you can share it with other’s you come in contact with too. Since God has put this on my heart, I have no doubt that he will put people in my path who need to hear what I have to say.